Open Roads and Cantaloupes
by RyokoJesseandFiend
Summary: BBrae oneshot. Cliche fluff angst. Raven's emotions are becoming uncontrollable. Beast Boy follows her when she runs away. Raven coming to terms with strong emotions of caring.
1. make a break for it

**A/N:** I'm not sure how this will end up. Maybe a one-shot, maybe longer, but definitely it will be Raven and Beast Boy. Some partial Starfire and Robin, you ask? I don't see it fitting in, but you never know with me when I write without planning. I'm working off a quote idea in my mind, a few delicate scenes that needs some fleshing out and elaborating, maybe some of Robin's training sessions.

Again, Robin is Richard (Dick) Grayson, Starfire is Kori Anderson (Koryand'r), Beast Boy is Garfield (Gar) Logan, and Raven is Raven. Just in case.

Oh yes, and as per my tastes, the TT kids are all three years older than in the show. HA.

**IMPORTANT NOTE: RAVEN ISNT A CUTTER IN THIS STORY. I'M NOT THAT CLICHÉ.**

**Disclaimer:** Well, let's see…Starfire and Raven are meditating behind me, Happy's sitting on my head (she's got to be tiny to fit in Raven's mirror!), Robin's tied up in my closet, and BB…he's in my bed. ; It's too bad they all are wearing collars that say "Property of Marv Wolfman". Starfire's has rhinestones.

Also, I don't own Mae. They own themselves, I believe. The lyrics are from their song "Summertime". 'Tis beautiful.

_-Feel the air. Feel the air._

_Take the map and point to anywhere._

_I don't care._

_Fingers through your hair and sky of sea, _

_Blue and green,_

_Oh the summertime.- _

"Summertime" by Mae

**Open Roads and Cantaloupes **_by RyokoJesse_

Snow slid on the wings of winter wind, tumbling around them and dotting their faces. He looked like an odd form of a Dalmatian, the cold crystals contrasting against his frigid green skin. Their eyes, both pairs, squinted at their chill surroundings. Gar's hair was beginning to freeze, as he'd just taken a shower, and her pale cheeks sported red as if painted, the wintry weather acting as an artist.

"This is kind of nice, don't you think?" She looked up at him, remembering the days when he'd had to do the same for her. It had been years since then.

He gazed leisurely at the area ahead of their close forms, ears rising slightly as a sign of thought. He turned to see her, the edge of his lips tilting into a gentle smile. It was direct, chasing her heart higher in her chest.

"I like how still the air is, as if it's waiting for something to happen. What do you think it could be?"

As if she was ignoring the prompting question, a hand reached to his face and cupped the cheek gently, wiping away snowflakes with her thumb. He reached up and grabbed her wrist, smiling as if the gesture was common. Still, as a naturally empathetic being, she saw that his eyes told her what was unspoken. He wanted to know her reasons.

"The snowflakes, they made you look like a Tamaranian food, all green and spotted."

He chuckled, mouth moving by her hand. She was becoming slowly aware of the warmth he was giving off, such an alluring feeling in the freezing atmosphere, and her eyes softened.

Then fear suddenly etched at her heart. It welled up in a rush, cutting off any previous thoughts. Her hand quickly ran to the other, wrenching from his grip and leaving two small cuts on the back of her hand. His claws were getting sharper as they got older. Her breath came labored as she stared at the red lines, guilty, saddened, and angry. How foolish, to run over nothing! She'd thought she was beyond that. She hadn't done something so silly in years. Then still relief echoed through her veins. They were at least safe. Any more of him could have put them both in harm's way.

She'd taken a long moment to regain herself and sensed his presence wasn't near. She turned, finding her companion had stopped just before the sidewalk corner and top of the incline. He looked very casual, hands in the pockets of a brown coat and eyes grooming the sky. His chin was a strange replacement for his head though, and out of curiosity she doubled back to join him. She, too, turned to face the sky, opening her mouth a bit to eat some of the endless edible flecks. Tired eyes searched the clouds for some sign of interest.

"So…what are we looking at Gar?"

He turned to her, an act of planned bewilderment sketched flawlessly over his features.

"Nothing, I just had a bloody nose."

It took a moment for her to understand what this meant, but things were all too clear when she felt the wave of giddiness in him. It had been a prank! A glare captured him after the punch line, her head shaking in disbelief at his antics. He grinned, fangs the color of the powder around them, and despite herself a small giggle jumped from the confines of her throat.

"I can't believe I tolerate you, you nut."

"Hey, at least I made you laugh."

"You did no such thing"

"And I could do it again if I wanted to"

She gave a quick, short exhale through her nose as her eyebrows slanted opposite of one another, a sign of skepticism. "I doubt it."

There was a silence, tentative, cautious. Was he taking the dare? Why was he looking at her like that?

"Can I kiss you?"

She blinked. In surprise. In wonder. Then she laughed. He smiled.

"I told you I could make you laugh." He gave her a sidelong glance, like he was testing her, and then sighed shortly and softly. His expression became curious and almost serious. He spoke

"But…"

"What?" Her neck arched forward, feelings thrown to the wind, thrown about as if a pinball. There wasn't enough mind in her to concentrate right then.

"I…" and he stepped towards her, removed a glove, and lifted her chin to face him, leaning in enough so that her face no longer felt the season's wind. "I really do want to kiss you." At this, his fingers traced her lips, a gentle, amorous sensation, making her eyes close and mouth to open.

"Why are you…?" His hand moved to tuck her hair behind her ear, sending her stomach aflutter. His other hand went to her waist, putting slight pressure to her hip, urging her closer.

_This is so beautiful…_

When the vulnerable flesh of his lips met hers, her mind stuttered. She didn't know how to do this! How does one kiss another properly? Were there classes for this sort of thing?

But nothing could have steeled her for a flood of emotions and fire, her head lightheaded and heart racing. What was happening felt right, and every movement was so gentle, so patient, so…

_Why is nothing exploding?_

Had she not just finished losing reasonable thought? Why was she suddenly thinking about her powers? She had just fought away the fear of losing control; it wasn't time to begin thinking of it again. She could forget the world and all of her irrepressible responsibilities if just for this one moment…if only for a second…

He pulled away. "I'll be near."

Raven awoke slowly. Her whole body was in such a state of warmth and luxurious comfort that she could have stayed there for days, basking in the contentment and pleasant fantasies muddling her mind. Her eyes were closed, so logic was shortcoming. It wasn't until Starfire's exuberant voice lit up her senses that Raven notice the shattered room around her. Her window, once a large, clear pane of glass, had shattered, sprinkling all manner of books, drawers, clothing, hangers, and broken statues with shimmering shards. Had the image not been so uninviting in its meaning, it would have seemed artistically beautiful.

"Friend Raven, it is now ten o'clock and last night you told me not to let you sleep late. I apologize for speaking so loudly at your first moment of waking, but I have been advised not to enter your room. I hope you wake up and come to the common room. We are all eating lunch and Cyborg has kindly prepared herbal tea for you."

"Thanks Star, I'm coming." The response was a hoarse groan.

Raven rubbed her forehead with stress after the small speech, reaching for her alarm clock but finding it in pieces, the normally bright green numbers nonexistent.

"Great, just great" she mumbled. She'd had another one of those stupid dreams about him. One day she'd hit her_self_ instead of her walls with the flying objects. At least she didn't sleepwalk. _Then_ there'd be trouble.

Sitting up, she experienced a moment as if she was blacking out, her vision became grey, and then everything came back into focus. She'd sat up too fast. _I hate it when I do that._ It always put her on edge to start off a day with such disorientation. Levitating swiftly to her closet, she removed her nightgown and under things, replacing it with the usual unmentionables, leotard, and cloak. Before leaving the room she donned socks-- fresh, clean, purple socks and boots-- and walked over the cluttered carpet to her door. She reached out to unlock it, when…

_Zap!_ A spark rushed from Raven's fingertips down her spine, round her shoulders and through her arms, causing her to shudder and growl in annoyance. She'd been shocked. Why couldn't the doors have been plastic? Was that so much to ask?

Being more careful, she fully triumphed over the steel obstacle with a small amount of telekinesis, then bore a left to the common room. Robin was briskly scanning the morning paper and sipping coffee, a very mature picture, perfect for the boy who'd become a leader too soon. Garfield was quite the opposite, his eyes half-open, vanilla soymilk in one hand and speared waffle in the other. It was as if he'd slept for no more than three hours the evening before, while Raven was positive every Titan in the tower had been dreaming by eleven last night. In fact, he'd probably slept _too much_ and _that's_ why he couldn't wake up.

Raven shook her head, tricking herself into looking down on the carefree boy with discontent. He was so…apathetic-- he stuffed a too-large piece of waffle into a loose jaw-- and very piggish this morning. Turning away with a raised eyebrow and mild disgust, her eyes landed on Starfire, seemingly standing on the ceiling, a plate held above…or rather below…her head. With a clumsy effort, she tilted the fork awkwardly to scoop a bit of egg, gently letting her wrist guide it to her mouth without giving into instinct and flipping everything onto the floor. Cyborg looked on in fascination beneath her.

"Hey Raven, are you seeing this? She's almost got it! I just told her I'd give her a bite of peanut brittle, and look what I got her to do!"

Raven, her face a bare lath, glared and headed underneath her Tamaranian friend. Her mind was already disquieted this morning, and the clamor wasn't helping. As she walked a sound erupted by her side, something akin to "Oh no, watch out!" and another from above her, this time a high-pitched squeak.

"Eep!" In a disgruntled heap, Starfire and her teetering plate of eggs had fallen unceremoniously on top of Raven, smashing yellow clumps into her--as I have mentioned--very clean clothing. It squished unpleasantly into her hood, the neck of her leotard, the back of her cloak…

In a whirlwind of unstable emotions, she took in Cyborg, Robin, and Beast Boy staring at her with faces of anticipation. She felt like a creature in a zoo, a lion let out of its cage, people running in fear, wondering "What would she do?" The looks only caused her to feel more psychologically tremulous, her anger quickly rising. Then she turned to Starfire, who had bruised her hip on the fall but not fully comprehended that she'd landed quite on top of Raven. Her head was tilted back, hair touching the floor and bright eyes closed, echoes of mirth bouncing off the common room walls. _Stop laughing, please stop laughing…_

Raven look at her, and immediately turmoil within her broke out. Rage and Happy were fighting, evenly matched in a very upsetting and confusing battle. Raven grabbed her head and the laughter died down, her friends noticing her condition.

A dark, violent rumble escaped her throat. "Get back at them! They deserve it! They shouldn't be so foolish as to-"

It became high-pitched, effervescent. "Oh Rage, be quiet you silly! You're such a party pooper, you know that? We made Starfire laugh, everything's okay!"

Clutching cold hands to her own mouth, Raven let out a little yelp and backed away slowly as time slowed and every titan's heart beat just a bit faster.

Her right foot hit Garfield's chair. She tripped, still keeping one hand to her mouth.

Silence.

She ran.

---

She never _did_ have that tea.

It was two thirty-six in the afternoon, to be exact, and Raven's mind was heavily concentrated on the count-down in front of her. Quickly nearing the last five seconds of the routine, she searched wildly for a nearby item; something solid to be used as a weapon…There was nothing in the bare landscape of the training room. Her difficulty level was too high, and called for control. Focusing avidly in her mind, three common words subconsciously echoed through the sky in a roaring crescendo. Epic ferocity lined the last declaration as black energy billowed from her fingertips, creating a rather large, rather formidable looking...what was that?

The neck of a giraffe, head of a dinosaur, limbs like a bird, but hind legs like a lion, it squawked, roared, and half-flew to its enemy. Raven's eyes closed, skin sweating profusely. Why was she having such _difficulties_? She had _tried_ to make a griffin. Eyes swerved to the left and caught all the Titans watching in confusion, wondering what her tactics were. The enemy drones drew near and the time dropped, hurdling faster and faster to zero. She'd succeeded _many_ times on this level! What was _wrong_? The mismatched creature she'd created tripped over its own feet, struggling to stand as her foe dodged the clumsy, misshapen form easily.

In a sigh of anger and defeat, Raven listened to the simulation power down and Robin's own sigh of worry and disappointment through the P.A. system.

"Raven, are you sure you're okay?"

A grim tone followed the inquiry. "I'll be fine, I just need some rest."

She'd slammed the door on her way out. It was abrupt, and Beast Boy's mouth nearly opened to retort towards her absent form, then closed. He had felt a small jump in his chest when she left, as if surprise had been an electric current through his system. Raven was moody again, meaning something was wrong; something important. Or maybe she was just having a bad day? Wrong time of the month?

He shook it off as Robin revved up the machine again as Starfire took the controls. The Boy Wonder slipped into a trap door and lithely descended a ladder to the grid floor below.

As the others oversaw Robin's training, Beast Boy felt the exit tugging on his mind, and soon green legs were taking him quietly down the corridors of Titans Tower. Adroit ears flicked, a gentle pitter-patter of boots on the steps to the main floor alarming his senses. From this sound, Beast Boy could predict where Raven was, and nimbly followed her. Once closer he found her scent, fresh and simple. He knew she never bothered with cheap perfumes or make-up, except for that one time with Malchior. It had scared him, for she suddenly had smelled of lilacs and roses, an odd and disconcerting combination.

Despite this, the natural aroma she gave off now was distinct and familiar. He was right behind her as she neared her own room. There she impatiently waited for the automatic door to open and swiftly levitated inside. Beast Boy pursued as an ant, watching as she plopped onto her bed. Her hands removed her hood and caught her head as it dropped in emotional defeat. Cloaked shoulders rose, and although she wouldn't cry, her entire body shook. Beast Boy could imagine the strength she was using, fighting the emotions flooding every bit of her. Sometimes he found it inconceivable, the way she fought so tirelessly, and felt guilty for the sentiments he himself experienced, but this feeling quickly evaporated when she stood.

Her face was flushed pink and hands trembled, delving into a dark closet. From the depths of it came a large suitcase, simple and brown. She pulled it to the bed and with quick, jerky movements placed many an article of clothing into the case. With a sense of dawning comprehension, Garfield blinked. She was _packing_? Where would she go? How would she get there? When would she be back?

_Would_ she come back?

Without thinking of the consequences in his panicked state, a green boy appeared in Raven's room from seemingly nothing. Jaw slack he walked to her side, placing a gloved hand on her shoulder. The fair girl jerked to face him and stepped suddenly backward. Her eyes were wild. The lamp on her dresser exploded and any light in the room dimmed. Their breathing was suddenly a distinct sound.

"Where are you going?"

Her face stiffened, cocooned in darkness and restraint. "Away"

"Why? Did I make you mad?" A sense of guilt washed over him, than disappeared with her next comment.

"You wouldn't be able to make me angry enough to leave." She was so succinct in her answers, making them only as long as they needed to be to get her point across. His mouth twisted in frustration. He felt relieved by the comment, but almost hurt for some reason he couldn't explain. It was…almost as if he was upset that his actions didn't affect her as much as he'd assumed.

"Then what is it?"

She was moving swiftly now, and he stood behind her. She turned to leave and he stopped her path with his presence. Inches from his face, her dark eyes narrowed and raspy voice stung his ears.

"It's none of your business."

Her glare was ricocheted stronger, more defiant. "I'm your _friend_, Raven. It's more my business than yours."

Her features loosened, mouth still a straight line, and eyes half-lidded with counterfeit apathy. She knew he was always there—never alone, he'd said.

One blink and she met his eyes again, tilting her head back to match his now-prominent stance. The years had done well on every Titan's stature except hers.

"I know I can tell you, Garfield, but I'm not sure what's going on myself. I just wish for you to trust me." She gripped the suitcase tighter, watching his eyes and pretending to try to find what he was thinking in their depths. She didn't have the strength to really face how he felt; his anger, doubt, and then patience.

He'd realized that with Raven there were many things better left unsaid. All would come in time. His patience was necessary, and he shouldn't have tried to force out the answer.

"I…sorry…I shouldn't have pried." He stepped to the side, insides twisting with nerves as he watched her leave. Her cloak brushed his side as she passed, soft and warm, and despite what she'd asked, his mind reeled with possibilities. He wondered where she could possibly go, why she was going, how long until she returned…everything he wanted to ask but couldn't. She'd always been this way, an enigma he'd been trying to figure out for the past four years.

"It's alright, but I've got to go."

Everything was still. They tested each others' gaze until he moved, and it was so fast that she couldn't stop him. Strong arms encased her body like a blanket, a warm chest against her cheek and chin sharp on her head. She tried to pull away but he held tighter. The rest of the lights blew out and she breathed slowly, nervously. He smelled like the wind and something sweet.

Again but more gently she eased back, out of the mind-boggling embrace. His lips became a thin line then the bottom disappeared under his teeth. His words were sewn together with apprehension when they reached her small ears.

"Good luck, and come back."

She turned, moving quickly to evade the rising emotions. She could ignore them, but he was making it hard. That was how he handled things, by feeling them. So it was no surprise that, in the middle of her turn, his hand snagged her wrist.

She gave him that gift, one last look that said she was sorry, that she couldn't say farewell in response because she was already on the edge. He understood and let her go, hand loosening. It wasn't her imagination when his fingers gripped her hand just slightly tighter as she pulled it through.

It wasn't his imagination when he saw the bloodstain on his gloves, brighter than a dream.

---

It was strange. Raven felt panicked both emotionally and physically as she flew towards the heart of Jump City. Things had been slow lately, every villain having realized it was safer to be evil away from the superheroes. In maybe another year they would quietly move on to another place and, if they were lucky, the Justice League would assign them to New York. The team would be ecstatic, but where would she be? How could she handle such a large, reckless city when she feared failing? Predictions that someday her abilities would become limitations were all she could concentrate on lately, and that morning things had been proving themselves true.

She wouldn't stay away for long. The "sick for home" as Starfire—no, Kori—had said would call her back. Raven was still getting used to using proper names. It had only been a week since they'd learned them. Robin had decided to wait until there was enough experience in the group to trust one another with their backgrounds. The night everything had been let out, each one had told their story. Raven's was written, a letter to them all. Cyborg, now Victor, had read it and Kori shed some tears. It was strange. Raven didn't like someone crying for her, but the Tamaranian had always been amazingly emotional. It was almost fitting.

The most valuable moment of the experience was the lack of hatred she received. Raven had expected not to be shunned and kicked out but at least to experience faces of fear, uncomfortable silences, and awkward glances.

None of that was to be.

There was gentle, empathetic quiet and patient features of concern, but never did the response become negative. For that, she was grateful.

She must have flown twenty miles when there was a sharp call to her left and shock sent Raven toppling out of the sky. Something grabbed the dropped suitcase and came to her level, its small, dark eye winking.

Raven's heart stopped. An open mouth brought forth empty air, words failing their usually witty accomplice. A green hawk was holding her things in its talons, and she could have sworn it would be smiling mischievously had it lips.

She knew he couldn't talk. It was obvious and probably killing him. If he became human he'd drop like a rock and she didn't have the energy to fly at this rate, carry her suitcase, and propel him all the way to…wherever she was headed.

In fact, it was good that he couldn't talk. There was nothing he could say to convince her to go back or begin a frustrating inquiry. She didn't want to turn around. Running away was too liberating.

The question was whether she would send him home. Half her mind said she would be best off alone, in case things just got worse while the other half said it would be best to have him for the same reasons. He had helped Terra control herself, so why not her? It wouldn't…_mean_ anything, but an outside presence might protect a vulnerable core.

She eyed him again, and he eyed her. They went through a cloud, came out; never lost eye contact.

"You're thinking hard about something, so do it already. I can't read everything you think while moving this fast."

_POP_

For a moment, the handsome but eclectic green man was suspended in air behind her. With annoyance and admiration she slowed to turn.

Arms crossed, she let him fall. Just for a bit though. She was impressed at the trust he'd put in her and annoyed both because he'd topped her and lost the suitcase along with himself.

When she caught him, he smiled. They reached even levels, Garfield's feet dangling half a foot below her own but noses matching planes. He opened his mouth and stretched his tongue, obnoxious but understandable for his chatterbox personality.

"Ah, thank you. I hate that little logistic. Who says animals can't talk, right? I mean, doesn't the name Doctor Doolittle mean anything to--"

Energy would not be wasted on pointless jabber. He called out an apology quickly, the sound waves stretching on the wind. Raven caught him and the two were immediately face-to-face once more.

"What do you want? Tell me or leave." She was being demanding, but he probably wouldn't get to the point anyways. The encounter here was riding on her nerves. In comparison to careless flight, stillness was a task.

"Look, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I wasn't going to follow but I paced the living room drinking soymilk for ten minutes before deciding the wild isn't safe; especially if your powers mess up"—she tried to interrupt, but he raised a gloved hand to silence her and continued--"And I'm sure that's what's happening. Don't deny it. We all know what you're carrying, Rae, and if doing this will help I'm all for it. But I want to come with or we're going home."

There was a tense lapse in conversation. Raven chewed the inside of her lip, muscles tense. Garfield prayed she'd let him come and prayed she couldn't read his mind while suspending both of them. In truth, he would let her go either way. She was old and wise enough to make her own decisions, but it made him nervous. The blood had been too bright and too much. It had even seeped through her costume, which entailed a lot.

Pale eyes closed. A deep sigh rushed through her lungs.

"Fine, you can come. But you have to carry my stuff. You've wasted my extra strength having to hold you up."

He smiled. His heart leaped. His mind reeled with the idea of what he could possibly do to help such a capricious and emotional person. Not to mention all the boundaries they'd have to set. She'd probably requests opposite sides of the fire, but he knew the first and most important thing on his list.

No mind-reading.

_Chapter one concluded._

Ryoko


	2. telling the truth

**A/N:** Enjoy please.

**Open Roads and Cantaloupes** _by RyokoJesse_

As expected, they traveled in silence. Raven hardly concentrated on him; she even forgot he was there. The wind blew any concerns away. Focus was pinpointed to her chakra and the feeling of relaxation her entire body was experiencing. It was incredibly relieving, something she could credit to nothing but flying. Garfield was surprisingly and generously aware of his position in relation to her. It may have been a trick of the mind, but it seemed every titan had become much more bearable since the week before. Maybe knowing each person's perspective was affecting their relationships more significantly than she'd predicted.

It was a few hours before Raven became mentally exhausted. Small jolts, like waves of electricity, ran through her. Her body was trying to jumpstart her brain to stay airborne. As it got worse, Gar nudged her occasionally, a subtle, worried look in his hawk eyes. It was until she nearly fell that he gave a sharp call, wrapped in anger and concern. She turned to him wearily and dropped, eyes closed and limbs dragging upward with the wind.

_POP_

Gar was immediately a pterodactyl, catching her limp form and landing heavily on a rocky cliff. Another, softer _pop_ and the green young man removed his companion's suitcase from his mouth. He wiped the saliva from the handle and opened in slowly, looking with caution for something she could rest her head on. There were shirts and jeans, bras and underwear, some money, a blanket, matches, and the Book of Azar. She'd packed without food or drink, so he assumed she'd been intending to stay in the city. The intent must have been weak, for now they were miles beyond Jump City's boundaries. Deciding the blanket would be a decent pillow, Gar carefully lifted Raven's head and slid the object beneath.

Dry sticks and round stones soon found their way to the immediate vicinity. Gar created a small fire pit for that evening's cold. She groaned awake as the sun went down and warm flames leapt to life.

"Good morning," he said softly.

"The sun's down."

He was quiet for a moment, soaking in her normal incredulity after passing out. His mind took the blunt route to mismatch her rearranged idiosyncrasy.

"It does that."

He absently poked the fire, eyes watching but not really seeing the flames. She came to sit closer to the warmth, and it was a moment before he spoke again.

"…Are you alright?" he asked, taking her in cautiously and worriedly with tired eyes.

She nodded, silent and a little sheepish. It had been willingly that she'd exhausted her powers. She'd been desperate for some way to release it all without losing control; just once.

He traced her face and shoulders with his eyes, noticed the nervous way she held pale knees to her chest. Her hands found a nearby stick with which she absently poked the fire. Her eyes didn't see it, in fact he imagined they didn't even see what was before her, but her exposed wrist was telling loud secrets. The wound that had leaked blood at the tower earlier that day no longer existed. As he had expected, it was healed, whether it was subconscious or not. Should he tell her? Had it just been from training, or was something bigger going on?

A tap on his shoulder. Quick, cold.

Maybe it would be best if he spoke up. She might need to know. But he second-guessed himself. She could already know and didn't need a reminder. She seemed to be fragile at present, and it really wasn't his business. She'd told him just earlier that day to trust her judgment, so he would; if not about running away, then about this.

Two more sudden taps, the same. A chill ran through him. Hackles rose.

Despite having come to a decision, he wasn't ready to accept it. A great pressure seemed to swell in his chest. His jaw opened of it own volition, and a choking sound nearly escaped. With a blind thought, he spoke.

"Look, Raven…" Her eyes were closed, mouth curved into a small frown. She was tired, but responded through a sigh.

"What is it?"

"Um," -–tap-- "Well…I saw--"

But she never heard his sentence. For once in his life, Gar hadn't watched enough television to have predicted the torrential thunderstorms approaching that evening. Rain ran its fated course along the wind's transparent hair, faster and wetter than a darting fish. Both titans jumped to their feet as the fire sizzled out. Raven, now wondering what he could have seen, screamed through the downpour.

"What did you see?"

He couldn't answer her like this and was shocked that she hadn't dropped the subject at the sudden and almost unnatural storm. Maybe she _did_ know and was afraid he'd found out.

"Is this really the time?" he shouted.

Gloved hands grabbed the suitcase and soaked blanket, then ran to the momentarily powerless empath. She was clutching her cloak like it would stop the heavens from crying, hood shielding most of her face, and despite the effort she was beginning to shiver. He imagined it had been a long time since she had ever been truly _caught_ in the rain without something to keep dry. He grabbed her shoulder with tested patience.

"Hey, toughen up. We need to find somewhere to stay. There aren't any trees as far as the eye can see. If there's a cave or outcropping nearby, we'd best be in it."

He was acting quick, smarter than she was used to. A green bat formed before her, screaming loudly. The useless eyes closed as he felt the landscape and she felt vulnerable, as if he was a blind person touching her face to view what could never be seen. It was five minutes and a few more screams later that he took human form again.

"Sorry it took so long. My echolocation's a bit rusty, but I think there's shelter this way."

He pointed ahead and a bit to the right. The two set off, again silently. Raven moved as fast as possible, but her lack of energy made her feet arduous and pace slow. Soon he slipped his arms behind her legs and back to carry her. She would have felt it was an act of irritation but she also felt his heart beat by her ear through the rain. She saw his face, tarnished with concern for her and aggravation at the weather.

She was thankful, although a bit uncomfortable with being so close to him. She thought of her dream in the snow and realized how closed she was in person when compared to the confines of her mind. She felt stupid for such restraint and she almost admitted the fear which caused it. Guilt lay prominent in her mind for not being able to repay her friend for his kindness. She wanted something to be done, something meaningful but didn't take much effort. When it happened, he didn't see it but she finished with nervous content, for It in itself was more astounding than any dream in any mind.

Raven smiled.

---

_Cold chipped at her bones and made her hands shake. Fear tore her to irrationality. The world around her was bright with a gentle sky and flower-dotted landscapes. Paintings, varying in intensity and simplicity, hung in the sweet air before her. They yelled, tunneling through her eardrums. It hurt so much just to hear that noise; to know that she'd made them scream. _

_The ground became an ocean. She sank like her feet were violently heavy stones. The sun erupted to life above her head. Oppressive feet became invigoratingly light. Her head reached for a surface she didn't know was coming. She wasn't swimming for it, but she flew. The water rushing by came in series of submerged waves, each swiftly joining the past to make room for more. They danced along her hips and propelled pointed toes towards the blurred above. It grew exponentially then broke._

_For a moment, she literally drank in the sunlight, mouth open and happy. It tasted of sweet mango and fresh cantaloupe. Only once before in her life had she tasted such unique fruit. Content with the sip of tame fire, she laid back and bathed in the warmth, minutes becoming hours and hours disappearing with contentment._

The early morning should have struck life into both damsel and beast, but the monster stirred first, both warm and cold, wet and dry. His mouth tasted horrible and he wished he'd brought a toothbrush and toothpaste. With a sigh he rolled onto his side, eyes still closed. He wondered why his bed was so hard and groaned with annoyance. He reached for a blanket but found none. Frustration made his muddled head ache as green eyes opened to brave the sun. Brows furrowed, a small animalistic growl erupted in his throat. Stupid blanket…

In quickly realized instants his lungs stopped, heartbeat doubled, and mind raced. He felt her breathe on his lips, sudden silence magnifying each respiration. He'd been about to bring his left arm down on her, thinking he'd been alone, and so was now hovering limb over shoulder. Incredibly, her eyes were still shut, features slack.

He breathed out; slowly.

But it seemed such a movement caused a reaction. Raven groaned and rolled back and forth, holding her breath in her sleep, a finger teetering on the trigger of a shot gun. The bullet soon fell from its deadly nest, Gar instinctively embracing its collision. In his arms she was warm, soft breasts on his chest and cold fingers loose near his face.

He felt a distinct sense of aching and seriousness that only she could inspire. Their foreheads touched kindly, as if shaking hands for the first time. Her chakra was hot but strangely comforting, its spiritual distinction obvious. Knowing his own hands were warm he carefully removed his gloves and pulled them over hers. He was gentle and silent, very careful not to wake her.

In that moment the youngest titan became a protector, a real emotion of concern and guard apparent in his actions. When he'd heard her story the week before, he'd learned that, despite all of her trials, the durability made her beautiful. In his mind she became precious, something he was not and never could be. He admired her and wanted to be good enough for someone so strong and careful. Most miraculous was the patient ease with which this perspective had grown. Garfield had been trying diligently for years to understand Raven, and it seemed that, in a few short weeks, everything was beginning to fall together.

In this comfortable state of existence, it was merely seconds before sleep took the changeling, his mind shoving away the idea of a goodnight kiss for the sentiment of circumstance.

---

It was many hours later when Raven did awake. She first tasted the strange flavor of cantaloupe before looking at her surroundings. It took a panicked moment to realize she was in a cave, but following that was the answer to _why_ she was there. Remembering Gar had gone with her, she propped herself on shaky elbows and saw the green man to her left, spread eagle. She shook her head, wondering just how he got into such a position. She noted with curiosity that his gloves were missing but thought nothing of it. They'd probably fallen off while he dreamed.

She lay back down, frustrated at herself and reviewing past events. She felt extremely vulnerable now, scared to imagine if she'd done or said something wrong the evening before. Her hands rose to her face in order to rub fresh eyes. When she felt fabric, the eyes opened and discovered grey gloves. Her mind reeled with thoughts of how and why he had put them on her, or whether she had done it herself in her exhaustion the night before. Hoping to find clues, her gaze swept once more to the quiescent boy.

What she had missed before was now apparent. He was peaceful as he slept. It was something very different and almost bizarre, yet oddly fitting and then slightly…attractive. When Garfield slept, his mouth was serious, eyes fragile, breaths even. His body moved slowly, patient, a quality he lacked during the day but even _personalized_ in slumber. It was mesmerizing in a sense. She was sure he wouldn't wake…

Warm fingers skimmed his chest, hand flattened lightly to rise and fall with each respiration. She was breathing nervously, eyes bright, shoulders tense. Her mouth lay loose in suppressed wonder and instinct until she bit her lip and hand slid, still gently, still cautiously, but now excitedly towards his shoulder. Along the journey she breathed in quickly in surprise. There was his heart, real and beating like any other, but unique because she hadn't ever thought of him with a heart, emotions, pain.

This newfound tranquility within him, this silent side; she wanted to soak everything in. She let her empathy control and felt the blankness in his mind, the distinct serenity she always lacked but struggled to achieve. His ear itched, his mind only noticing enough to cause a twitch but not wake up. The movement shook her from her daze and reminded her he could wake up at any time. Quickly and carefully, her body returned to her own end of the cave. She didn't want to disturb him, she'd tell herself, but really it was a matter of being caught. She got lucky.

Just as her head hit the makeshift blanket-pillow, her friend came to tender life.

---

It was half an hour later that the two set off for the city. Garfield had borrowed some pants and a t-shirt from Raven, and she had changed herself. Wet spandex was chilly, uncomfortable, and sometimes caused a rash. Gar got lucky and was extremely lanky. Due to this, he didn't seem a complete fool in girl's jeans and a smaller shirt. Had he been Robin, there might have been problems.

Both had quickly become hungry, so with the small amounts of money each had brought they headed for a cheap restaurant Terra had told Gar of years ago. He said he'd come there every so often, just to think about their lost titan, and the food was sold at low prices. Raven settled easily. She didn't care as long as her stomach stopped threatening her with its rocky growl.

It was a quiet flight but certainly less tense than the first. Garfield was surprisingly calm, not even making a swoop of contentment the way he usually did, but he stayed relatively close. At the sight of the small, friendly diner, both lowered and walked in. Each was careful to keep their mind on what they were going to eat next, ignoring the situation's bright resemblance to a date.

Welcoming counter stools found visitors. Raven immediately began to scan the menu but Gar's eyes were wandering, uncertain where to leave them. He knew exactly what he wanted and was wondering where the usual front employee was. Suddenly, a head popped up right in front of Raven's concentrated face.

"HEY! You're a new one in these parts!" he nearly yelled, cutting off the "h" of his initial greeting.

The startled girl jumped back in her seat, toppling very suddenly and unceremoniously towards the floor. She was lucky Gar's animalistic abilities included brilliant reflexes. His wide green palm was the only thing keeping her from a humiliated heap on the floor.

The bright-eyed, portly man ignored the lady's fall. Instead, he cupped a hand to his mouth and elbowed Gar, his face contorting mischievously. His next words were soft, taking advantage of the confusion of the woman a few feet away. "She's a mighty fine one too, if you don't mind me saying. Rather pleasant" --he made a rather bizarre gesture near his chest and winked— "if you know what I mean."

Needless to say, Gar's face had been turning six shades of red as soon as his rather obnoxious friend had appeared. It now hit a very noticeable level. As soon as the smell of grease left his nose (the man stood up straight again), Raven questioned his flushed appearance.

"It's nothing," he replied a bit too adamantly. The answer was a highly incredulous look, soon interrupted by a loud New York-Italian accent.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so rude." Garfield seemed hopeful that maybe, just maybe his old friend would apologize for his discourtesy. Instead, he wiped his hands on a stained white cloth and raised the right in greeting. "The name's Marco, owner of this here humble joint." With a proud air he flipped the cloth over his shoulder and gestured fantastically to the menu above them. "We've got burgers, seafood, chicken, pizza, fries, and not to mention our famous vegan menu to the left. Top it off with your choice soup of the day, then finish with my beautiful wife Patricia's homemade ice cream. _Delicious._" He kissed his fingers with a huge smile, smirking once more at Garfield, and left behind the counter.

Raven seemed rather stunned. "He's quite…"

"Intolerable?" A glare ricocheted from green eyes to a mischievous smirk. Seducing the lady already, and with the cheesy ad campaign he'd heard Terra kick back in his face years ago.

She responded thoughtfully, letting each word linger as if tasting each and critiquing the flavor. "…No, he was…unique. I know this seems strange for me to say, but I kind of like his passion for such a small place. It says a lot."

This, in its bizarre and patient manner, sent Garfield into a fiery rage. He tried to wrap his mind around the idea that Raven had been conned by someone he expected her to blast into next week. His hands couldn't find the right expression to show his frustration and shock, running rampant through disheveled hair and accompanying a mouth lost for literacy. His eyebrows twisted with disbelief and confusion.

Raven was shocked at realizing she'd confused him with her odd reaction to Marko. She had tried to be make an effort to look for the best in someone, and besides that she'd felt his pride in huge waves of emotion. It had been hard to ignore, so she took the chance to be the less-pessimistic Raven for her friend. Somehow, this was not at all what the changeling had wanted or expected. Therefore, overcome with the irony of the situation, she laughed. A pale face broke with joyous mirth and the lights in "Marko's Manor" flashed rainbows across the public's face before popping into darkness.

Gar couldn't help himself, for in his anger and uncertainty something within _him_, whatever beautiful and magical thing it was, had made _Raven_ _laugh_, and after all of those years of teasing and pathetic jokes and then finally just giving up on ever breaking through such a stubborn exterior…a miracle had fallen into his arms and kissed him like a happy Golden Retriever at Christmas. He watched her escalation from sicker to full-out hilarity as Marko dried a wet cup from the sink and watched with perplexed eyes.

My God, she was _cracking up_! She'd fallen onto her knees and he shook his head, fighting to contain the toothy grin biting away at his cheeks.

"Hey, are you guys going to order anything or what?" Marko's thick and distinctive voice got Raven and Gar's disoriented attention easily. The green one held out a hand to Raven, whom took the offering guiltily. They both sat at the counter to order, Garfield requesting a tofu burger and Raven a salad.

"Coming right up!" said Marko before sweeping into the back, mumbling something about freaky kids and electric budgets.

Raven looked at her surroundings with apprehension, realizing the damage that had been done. She sighed all of the giddiness from her system, a chill passing through her spine as she did so, and set her warm hands on her lap. The world ran away rather promptly, and she felt each muscle in her back tighten as her teeth found the soft flesh of her lip. She had nearly drifted into meditation and forgotten everything when Beast Boy's hand reached her shoulder. Her eyes opened with a flutter, showering her companion with expectancy.

"Raven, it's okay." The lights were on once more, and a woman to her right was casting a concerned glance in her direction. "They fixed the lights, it was just a fuse." He was unsure of what to say, how to console her. "…We can leave an extra tip-- if you want."

She blinked from the other woman's gaze and shook her head quickly. "No, it's okay. Let's just…go."

The food arrived seconds later. Raven rummaged haphazardly through her suitcase, but could only find a five. She left it nervously on the table and quickly left through the front door; suitcase and salad in tow. In a swift and surprising move of chivalry, Beast Boy pulled a ten from his boot and let it rest on the counter by Raven's contribution. Marko looked at them both bewilderedly. Gar smiled.

"Keep the change."

One hand grabbed the tofu burger; the other opened the door to follow Raven.

--

The bright sun ran unchecked over Garfield's face as he left the diner. Raven was walking steadily to the left, nearing a sports field and hill. He called after her, louder than he knew she wanted to hear. She was gripping the plastic salad container too tightly. There was too much emotion for regularity, and unwritten rules were falling from the heavens like dying crows.

She couldn't speak. She waited for his hand to graze her shoulder, as predicted, then dance away in shock and she jerked away in anger to hide the vulnerability. Her hand made its deft way to the other arm's wrist.

A whim played its way onto her brain then activated her legs into rhythmic pulsations, timed steps and leaps and rushes of wind, invisible tears, and dropping the stupid salad on the ground behind her. Running. Falling faster than anything because she wanted to trip and imagine him catching her, imagine the one thing that was the antithesis of all that was what she had to be and tried so hard to be. If that hadn't caught her before, couldn't he catch her now? Nothing else could. And if that didn't work, then hell, she'd probably get herself killed so the whole freaking world wouldn't suffer later.

It wasn't by speed that his arms happened to be underneath her torso when she fell. His existence was primarily there because of her mind. Of course, two people with so much ability and so much wish to be the same place at the same time can create a rather mighty achievement. So it was that Raven fell heavily into his arms, and knocked Garfield flat off his feet. The changeling held her there on the ground with curiosity and worry in his mind – brighter than the glow of pub signs.

She grabbed his head really tightly, the back f his neck, and then she spent her ragged breath on the cotton of his shirt, lifted that because she wasn't getting very far and scratched the living daylights out of his stomach. When it started to bleed, her grit his teeth harder and waited. His own hands reached her wrists a bit later, flying calm to her fingertips then up through her heart. She had never seen him look so serious.

"What happened to your wrist," he said. It wasn't a question.

She gulped.

"You cut it open – your claws – in my dream. I think…" she looked away, but he tipped her chin with force enough that she could only consent. "I think my emotions are becoming unavoidable."

"You mean real."

She nodded, his hand dropped.

"Then you're not sure what to do – there's nothing you can do, is that right?"

Another nod, this time smaller, and a clear tear fighting its way down her face.

"Look at me, Raven," and this was plead, so different but more in character.

She did, because she didn't know what else to do, and because he was awake this time, with the solemnity and peace she'd admired in the cave. He lifted her wrist and removed the cuffed gloves, making her entire body crackle with emotion: anxiousness. When he kissed it, the worry left, the tears came harder, and something opened powerfully in her chest. Freedom.

"Maybe Trigon doesn't need to be defeated by vigilance and superpowers and control. Maybe we can call it a day and decide there's nothing to do but care about one another. What could he do with that kind of emotion if we really meant it?"

Like a wave the air flew through her lungs and back out, eyes closing with the undertow and opening with a decision. He was right. And if he was wrong, she'd sacrifice herself for their lives. At the least she'd know.

Lips touched clumsily and quickly because she wasn't going to allow herself to think about it. She stretched out over him; partly kneeling and feeling him begin to kiss her back. That was something - to have her eyes closed and notice that every bit of fire erupting through her skin was caused by him. The flutter in her heart and mind and stomach intensified with movement until she felt dizzy and head almost hurt with the full onslaught of feeling.

His arms moved underneath him and lifted his torso, stretching forward and upwards, responding more powerfully than her –and she got it. This whole time he'd wanted her too. As he pressed harder her mouth opened in shock, Garfield taking his chance to deepen the kiss. She nearly fell backward with the newness of it all, not to mention the unbalanced position she was in. Her hands gripped his shoulder quick to save herself, but there was no need. One hand was already round her back and snaked onto the nape of her neck. His lips trailed lazily and gently over her own then, down her chin, down to her neck which sent her mind reeling, then to her ear which seemed strange but became her new secret pleasure. Every movement seemed drunken and impulsive, and she knew she was doing the same thing. She opened her eyes for a moment and looked at his expression; eyes closed and then open to catch her gaze. He was breathing heavily. His eyes were bright.

Inexplicably, she smiled. She wasn't trying to, wasn't thinking about it, and really didn't want to. It just didn't seem to fit, but she did, with a Cheshire grin as nothing could wipe it off, even a concrete smack on the face.

Her smile was infectious, so he did too, and lifted the hand from behind her back. She felt cold without him there, but now the hand was in plain view and trembling uncontrollably.

"You're making me shake with emotion." He chuckled at the irony, when she looked at her own hand and brought it up to his.

"Me too" She snorted in contented disbelief.

He still had something to say - something else.

He kissed her nose, and the most playful gesture became more somber than death.

"You know," he said with a gentle lilt to his voice. She could tell he was comfortable with her, for the first time. He was generally confident. She loved it. "You taste like cantaloupe."

She smiled again, really laughing and now falling in love with his intricate endearments.

"And you taste like tofu burger."

So she kissed him again.

---

Ryoko – forgive the random variation of writing styles-slash-genres in this. I wrote it in bits and pieces at the weirdest times.

Please review.


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